All over the internet, on Facebook and twin flame forums I often read about people's experience with their "twin flame" who is emotionally, mentally (and sometimes physically) abusing them as they sit there feeling victimised waiting for that person to change. If a person is talking to you in a nasty manner, playing a million and one mind games or making promises they never keep just so they can get into your pants, then they are not your twin flame! That is abuse! A real twin flame could not conceive of the idea of hurting you. Yes, a real twin flame can have an ego reaction and lash out, but not to the extent of it being abuse.
You will just know the difference deep down. If a person is actively being nasty to try and get rid of you and push you away, then it is a karmic connection. A real twin flame connection is based on love so when they run they aren't abusive in doing so, they are just naturally repelled if there is more work to be done individually.
Karmic connections bring you down, eat away at your self-esteem and leave you feeling energetically sick. They suck out your energy and leave you feeling like the walking dead because you literally have no energy or happiness left. Twin flame connections on the other hand lift you up. They fill you with peace and great excitement and joy because they fill you with so much positive energy even when you are separated. You just know that one day, when the conditions are right, you will be united in peace and harmony. A real twin flame connection brings out the best in you, not just the worst like the karmic connection.
With a true twin flame connection, both twins want to make it work because the love is so strong and real that it cuts away at the fear, dissolving it over time. Real twins can't help but feel drawn to working through their baggage in order to step into their true selves and living their truth. It will take time yes, and the ego will pop up a lot along the way, but the love still holds them together as they never give up on their soul purpose that emanates from every cell of their body and every energy fragment of their being.
With true twin flames, the ego slowly dissolves rather than seemingly getting stronger because the ego can never match the strength of twin flame love. Initially, the ego will be most prominent, but over time, real twins will simply feel how futile and silly it is to let the ego continue to control them when it's all just illusion.
So many seem to be caught up in co-dependency with someone who is using and abusing them. If this person is acting selfish, then it is not your twin flame. If this person is calling you names or telling you to get lost, then it is not your twin flame. However, you also need to examine yourself. There seems to be many (particularly females) who push and push and push their supposed twin flame to be this way or that way and do this and that. They demand them to open up emotionally and commit to them and it is just so desperate. It's not from a place of love, but from a place of fear. It is often the co-dependency that scares these people away. Maybe they have to be that harsh just so you get the message. But still, if it's that chaotic, then they likely aren't your twin flame but are about learning lessons to do with fears of abandonment and not loving yourself enough to be whole within.
With a true twin flame you will just know because although you may be separated, you still feel at peace. You want the best for this person and you accept they are not ready because you love them unconditionally. If you are so angry and bitter because this person has left you and refuses to speak to you, then you are not loving them unconditionally and they run because you are trying to cage them in. Real twin flames set each other free by helping them release any bondage they have in their life. False twin or karmic connections are all about possessiveness and fear and conditions. You will just know the difference. Do you feel sick and desperate and a sense of negativity, or do you feel a positive, uplifting feeling as if this is the greatest gift from God?
A true twin flame only wants the best for you, even if that means not being with you. A fake twin flame won't care about your feelings and will just do what they want regardless. Be honest with yourself. What is the point of holding onto the twin flame label if it is only holding you back and preventing you from meeting the real thing?