Is it just me who is in pain??
I am sure you all have asked yourself this question over and over when your twin flame runs away from you and your connection. Many twin flames are going through the heart wrenching agony of being left in the dust with a ton of questions left unanswered and a ton of pain shattering their heart each and every day that they are left out in the cold.
When a runner runs, they run hard and the chaser is often left feeling helpless, thinking, "What the hell just happened?!" and "Was it all just in my head?!"
How can he seem so okay (even happy) without me??
The hardest part to swallow is when the runner appears to be doing just fine without you, maybe even happy, with a new relationship or a new place of residence across the other side of the world. One minute they were blissfully happy with you and you spent all your time together, the next, poof! and he's vanished into thin air.
How many times have you checked his Facebook page and wanted and felt pain at the sight of him smiling in so many photos as he goes about living his life and having a good time?
It can make you feel crazy, almost like it never happened or it was all one-sided. But you know deep down that what you both felt for each other was real. And you just KNOW in your heart that he loves you JUST AS MUCH as you love him (if he really is your twin flame of course!).
So what the hell is he (or she!) doing? And why the hell is he doing it??
Twin flame union is a process whereby we are initiated back into our true soul identity whilst living on Earth. We are challenged by a mind that's been brainwashed with so many illusions that we are told are "truth".
The ego creates an identity for us or a "self image" whereby we believe we are what our ego tells us we are. Our ego or false identity is often constructed through many negative and damaging beliefs formed from our own negative experiences - "I am unworthy because no-one ever loves me!" - and the damaging illusions of society (just look at all the stereotypes we are expected to mold ourselves into and believe are truth - a man's worth is based upon his pay-packet, a woman's worth is based upon her looks, men need to be logical, woman are too emotional and therefore cannot be trusted to make sound decisions, men are "expected" to follow their dicks, women are "whores" if they enjoy sex too much - the list is endless!)
These damaging illusions take us away from our realisation that we are divine! These illusions create all the pain, war, fear in the world. Twin flames decided to incarnate upon this planet to help it return to the vibration of our soul truth - love, union, joy, peace, wholeness within. In order for us to wake up from these toxic illusions to be able to return to this joyful truth and help others to wake up too, our soul must shock our ego out of the illusions.
In truth, your twin is not really running, they, just like you, are going through this call of awakening. This initiation to release all illusion is very threatening to the ego at first. The awakening caused by twin flames meeting asks of us to shed our ego selves, our wounding (which is only caused by the illusions) and our co-dependency (believing only another can validate us as being good enough for love because we've suffered the illusions or such a long time).
This process back into our truth wants us to realize that wholeness / happiness / love / complete fulfillment DOESN'T comes from outside of ourselves / from another / from our twin / from a relationship looking a specific way etc. It asks us to return to the TRUTH that we are always whole, happy, love and in union WHEN we simply release this 3D idea of separation. It asks us to strip away our masks and walls we learned to erect in young childhood to protect ourselves from rejection and abandonment we experiences emotionally or physically with our parents. It asks us to be vulnerable, to suddenly be able to understand our intuition and follow our heart instead of the "safety" of logic.
We are called by our soul's to TRUST beyond what the eye can see or what we have been told is "truth" and to live the truth even though everyone else around us will likely still be asleep. Men are called to become more sensitive when they've been taught to be hard and strong and unemotional by the society around them. Women are called to trust they are worthy and will receive the love they never felt they got as a child without having to chase it or compromise their dignity or self respect for it. The feminine is being called to be a strong and confident being, erecting healthy boundaries when necessary as this is her way of loving herself in a world where she's been pressured to be a martyr. This is her way of coming into her self-union which paves the way for union with her twin flame if that is part of their soul contract in this lifetime. To find out more about how the feminine can truly empower herself the right way to come back into inner union read my article here.
When a twin flame appears to be running, really they are going through this initiation. It takes time for us to work out what is real and what is illusion - to keep believing society or our ever-growing intuition. Naturally it takes time for us to uncover our intuition - it's not like we suddenly see the total and utter truth of everything we need to know overnight. It happens in stages. Many of us have been conditioned to repress our natural soul selves for our entire lives so it takes baby steps at first. Me especially are taught to repress their emotions - the key aspect of following our heart and intuition! They are taught they are weak, not man enough and are acutely ridiculed from a very young age if they display an such "weakness". Naturally they are going to fear this judgement, criticism, rejection and ridicule when they initially feel the call to live their truth authentic self. They will likely even fear this rejection from their twin.
This soul shock describes how they feel completely shocked, confused and seemingly unprepared for the intense spiritual awakening that is occurring within them.
For a runner, the spiritual awakening completely turns their life upside down in a way which is very unsettling, scary and unexpected. It's an extremely traumatic time for them because suddenly they feel thrown into an existence that feels completely alien to them and they feel utterly lost and alone. They try to cling to their old life because that is the only place they feel safe. Even though they are outgrowing their old life and feel suddenly distanced from it and everyone in it, they are even more scared of the unknown and often lonely experience of the initial awakening process.
Many think it's only the chaser who experiences soul shock but runner twin flames go through it too
The intensity of the awakening process and the sense of having no control over it and their life anymore shakes them to the core. Also, there are often immense fears when it comes to the emotions involved in these connection. The runner's soul goes into shock because such intense love opens their heart completely, but in the process, old and bottled up emotions also rise up to the surface for healing. This is where any self-judgement and old childhood wounding comes up and the runner does not feel they can cope with such pain.
Many runner twin flames fear they would not be able to get back on their feet if this happened. Most runners are males and it directly correlates to society oppressing men in terms of accepting, expressing and processing emotions. For most men in society, it's socially condemning to be emotional, so when such intense emotions come up in twin flame connections, they literally don't know how to deal with them because they have never been taught how. So they do what they have been taught to do with emotions, deny them, bottle them up and just hope they disappear. Unfortunately that means avoiding you.
There are several reasons why twin flames run and it's important to understand these reasons in order to assist your reunion back into balance
A lot of twin flame chasers inadvertently cause their runner twin flame to run for longer than is needed in this delicate stage of soul shock.
**And it's because a chaser IS a runner!!**
A chaser is really trying to grab a hold of love / validation / healing from outside of themselves (still believing in the very illusions that we are "separate" from love that twin flames are here to obliterate). If you are a chaser twin flame then it's a sign you are still in this stage of ego / soul shock and aren't fully seeing the truth yet that you need to align with for union to occur. It's to first unite with your soul within which means you heal yourself, love yourself, validate yourself and know you are always worthy, good enough one with love and everything you need within yourself simply because you are a divine soul. And then, and ONLY then can you be of that vibration of soul TRUTH to attract union on all levels inwardly and outwardly (with the reflection of yourself, your twin!)
Runner twins are lost and very lonely and frightened, just like chasers are. They don't know what to believe and trying to force them to open up and get closer is running from your soul's desire to heal YOURSELF and not look to your twin to fill in those voids - they cannot, only you can. So union cannot happen with your twin until you have both united with your soul individually, united with that healing, love and wholeness.
I chased my twin flame for years this way, thinking he just wasn't getting it and I thought that if I could just prove to him how much I loved him then he would feel safe to reciprocate. I was totally blind to what was REALLY going on!!
When I FINALLY gave up chasing my twin my spirit guides had the time and space to actually get through to me! When I was chasing I was focusing so much on my twin, focusing outside of myself when really the direction forward into union with both myself and my twin was being shown to me by my guides from within my own heart. They showed me the RIGHT way forward into union. It took time and A LOT of trust but I got there, WE got there, my twin and I! Union really does have to happen within first, and you need to get to a stage where you want to unite with yourself for your own peace over wanting union with your twin - and then "ironically" it can happen because you know you have everything you need within yourself to be happy and so you have finally released co-dependency and all the outdated relationship paradigms we are here to shift. For very in depth information on how the divine feminine's often mistakenly push their divine masculine away and how the masculine's higher self causes him to run to give you a powerful wake up call get my free eBook here
I want to help you achieve reunion with your twin flame too
I want to be the one to hold your hand and give you TRUE direction into union and comfort along the way. I want to show you how to overcome all the obstacles and misunderstandings and show you how to truly heal yourself and your connection. I want to show you how to raise come into wholeness within so it reflects as wholeness with your union with your twin. I will show you how to raise your vibrations out of fear (which blocks union) and into alignment with the love vibration so your reunion can happen on ALL levels.
I have created a FREE eBook called "The Runner Twin is Giving You The Biggest Wake Up Call" to help you see why exactly your twin is running in order to help you really shift into your own self union. I will describe in detail how your twin's higher self is causing him to keep his distance until you come to these realisations and shift yourself. Huge transformation occurs within your connection when you understand these fundamental dynamics. It is full of profound wisdom from my spirit guides and my own experience over this past 10 years plus.
If you are truly serious in healing yourself, doing the shadow work and uniting not only with your true soul self but also your twin flame as part of your divine destiny, then I really feel my eBook will help you tremendously. I have received so much positive feedback over the years from other twin flames who have benefited greatly from the insights within my work.